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Childcare Cues, Parenting Tips

6 Ways of Getting Your Toddler to Listen and Pay Attention

Discover six super cool tricks to make your little one listen and pay attention, it's the toddler whisperer guide

a mother talking to her kid
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We get it – getting a toddler to listen can be a real challenge. Those little explorers have their own ideas and love testing boundaries. Ever feel like throwing in the towel or losing your cool? Totally normal. But here’s the deal: there are some really effective ways to get a toddler to listen that don’t involve yelling or timeouts. Let’s dive into why these tiny tots sometimes resist tuning into what we’re saying.

Why Don’t Toddlers Listen?

toddler not does not listen to her parents talking to her

Understanding toddlers is key. They’re at a stage where they’re figuring out their own likes and dislikes. Sometimes, that means saying no or being a bit defiant—it’s all part of them learning about what they want. Like when they avoid veggies because, let’s be honest, sweet treats are way more appealing to them. It’s a toddler thing, you know? They’re just listening to their taste buds! 

Toddlers have short attention spans. They tend to get distracted quite easily, so really getting them to focus on what’s being said can be a bit tricky. You see, they’re always busy exploring their world and learning through play. This makes it hard for them to stop and listen, you know? It’s just the way they are, always curious and wanting to discover new things. So, when you’re chatting with a toddler, keep in mind that their little minds are like sponges, soaking up everything around them.

As grown-ups, it’s crucial to know that these actions are just your toddler growing up, not them trying to frustrate you on purpose. So, here are six easy ways to get your toddler to listen. Remember, it’s all part of the growing-up gig, and we’ve got this.

1

Positive Reinforcement

Mother and toddler playing, talking and listen to each other

Toddlers really love it when you notice the awesome things they do. It’s easy to get caught up in pointing out what they shouldn’t do, but did you know that praising them for the good stuff works wonders? Yup, studies say it helps shape their behavior in a cool way.

So, instead of always saying, “No, don’t do that,” try catching them doing something awesome and give them a thumbs up. Like, if they put away their toys, you could say, “Wow, great job putting away your toys!” It’s like a little high-five for their good behavior. This not only makes them feel good about themselves but also makes them want to keep doing those cool things.

Remember, little moments of praise can go a long way in making them feel super proud and confident.

2

Get Down on Their Level

Mother squating to talk to her son

If your little one isn’t tuning in when you talk, try this trick: get on their level. Yep, I mean crouch down or kneel so you’re eye-to-eye with your toddler. It might feel a bit goofy, but it shows them you think what they have to say is super important. So, let’s say they’re wrapped up in their toys – plop down on the floor and say, “Hey, I’ve got something really important to share with you.” Watch how it grabs their attention and makes them more likely to listen.

You can also turn it Into a game Make listening fun! Say, “Let’s see how fast you can put those toys away!” It’s like a mini-play for them.

3

Use Simple Words

toddler listen to their dad talk to them

Keep it simple. Toddlers might get lost in the big words, so go for short and sweet. We usually think little ones get everything we say, but their talking and understanding skills are still growing. Talk in a way that’s easy to get and skip mean words or sounds.

Nice words show kids how cool it is to be nice and caring. Don’t forget, when you chat, your little one should feel like you think they’re important and awesome. Using simple words is super important in helping your toddler understand what you’re saying and making them feel valued.

4

Avoid Yelling

Father talking calmly to his toddler as they listen

When we’re feeling frustrated as parents, it’s totally normal to want to raise our voices and maybe even yell. But you know what? That might not be the best way to get your toddler to listen. In fact, it could have the opposite effect, making them tune out or become more defiant.

So, here’s a little trick: try using a calm and firm voice to get your message across. Your toddler is more likely to pay attention when you speak in a clear and composed way.

5

Offer Choices

A girl picking the boots she likes

Ever notice how your little one’s life is like a big puzzle of rules and routines? It can make them feel like they’re in a whirlwind, not sure where to steer. But here’s a trick: instead of just laying down the law, why not hand over some choices? Yep, it’s like giving them a little steering wheel.

So, rather than barking, “Put on your coat now,” try something more like, “Do you want to rock the red coat or go for blue today?” See what we did there? It’s like a toddler-friendly menu. And guess what? It makes them feel like the captain of their ship, even if it’s just a tiny coat ship. Plus, they’re more likely to hop on board with your plan.

6

Remove any Distraction

A parent collecting a child's phone to get their attention

Sometimes toddlers can be a bit all over the place, right? It’s not that they don’t want to listen; they’re just easily distracted little beings. So, when you really need your toddler to tune in, here’s a trick: shut down all the distractions. Yep, turn off the TV, stash that phone away. Make it their moment to focus on what you’re saying.

When you do this, it’s like giving them a little signal that says, “Hey, something important is happening here!” And you know what? It helps them zero in on your words. They’re more likely to listen up and follow whatever awesome instructions you’re giving them. Plus, it’s a way of telling them that what you’re saying is a big deal and totally worth their attention.

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